When life with three babies gets hard, sometimes you just have to cry

It's no secret that having kids is hard work, exhausting, exhilarating, trying, and yet the most rewarding thing. Most moms will tell you so but not in great detail. Most moms won't tell you about their most difficult moments everrr. But this mom will.

Most Mondays I wake up with a determination to stay ahead of the monster. The monster I like to call Mr Mess. That whirlwind of dirty dishes, over flowing laundry hampers, half clothed kids, and dinners that are slapped together between a bun. Usually I feel like Mr Mess is as close as my shadow, ready to snatch me up and swallow me hole. And even if I manage to stay only one step ahead the entire week I feel like I have conquered the world. I feel exhausted but extremely pleased with myself. I feel like I could shout from the rooftops with joy and laughter. However, on those weeks that things don't go as planned, like I cram one two many things into my week, or something unpredictable happens like a child gets sick, then suddenly I am swallowed whole and I find myself surrounded by disorganization and chaos. Usually when this happens I just pick myself up, dust myself off and try again next week. I mean, after all, the most important thing is my kids are happy, healthy and loved. And I really do believe I am the luckiest woman to have three beautiful children and a hard working husband. We have a roof over our heads... a small roof, but a roof none the less. We have our dreams we are working towards and wonderful friends to share life with. So on the grand scheme of things a messy, disorganized house is really not all that important. simple right? .....

Except sometimes its not that simple. Sometimes it's just really hard. When you have been potty training for a year and a half and you wish just one of the million things you have tried would just work already. Or when you know your big break is about to come but two months seems to drag on forever. Or when the organizing just never seems to end. When in 20 years you know your house will be so quite and you will miss your children but right now you just want 5 minutes of silence. Sometimes you can't just dust yourself off. Sometimes you just have to cry. And you cry to the only person who can hear your sobs at 11:43 at night. You ask Him to please change it all and make it easier but deep down you know He is using it to make you strong. Sometimes you just have to tell Him every last feeling you have because you are so tired of holding it all in. And after your pillow has soaked up all your sorrows and He has dried that last tear from your cheek you drift off to sleep and wake up ready to do it all again. Why? Because of love. Because He loves you and only has good things for you. Because you love your children and they are worth the fight. Because you and your husband love each other and you need each other to make this work. Because HE IS LOVE and He is enough to carry you through.